otsukaresama deshita.

firstly, tears form every time i try to break it down. secondly, i would not be able to live the life i dream of without the support of my extraordinary mother. i wonder why i'm the luckiest to have been blessed with such an amazing woman as my mentor, friend and mother. had i lost her in 2002 or 2008, mine and the lives of many, would be very different today. she is my rock and i'm forever thankful and grateful for her. 

 

i've never felt more accomplished. 3 years of wanting something so badly, and making it happen. living and working in a foreign country for 13 months. something i knew would change me forever. i'm changed, i've grown, i've met people who have taught me so much about life elsewhere. i've retained so much about England(cheeky), Scotland(a dinna kin), Germany(ich leibe dich), South Africa(dutch; ek het 'n gekyr in daardie persoon),Japan(oishii), Singapore(okay la), Australia(oi), Canada(eh)...America! gaining knowledge about different cultures is one of the most beautiful things you can experience. to know that my expectations were true, that i would become wiser and better-shaped as a person and discover so much about myself, through learning about others, is humbling and nourishing to the soul. 

  the temples. the shrines. there is nothing more peaceful than observing a Japanese shrine or temple. maybe it's the silence, the discipline of the Japanese, the intricate architecture, or the ability to feel true serenity just by existing in such a beautiful place. i feel a sense of understanding. i leave feeling lifted, and appreciative just to be alive. 

i'm overwhelmed with the thought of this year being over. i literally could make myself ill if i think about it too much. the details i remember are so clear, yet it feels like a dream. i close my eyes and can see every single important moment, more vividly than any other year in my life. i've always been able to visit my many previous homes…i'll do what i can to come back to Japan someday. 

 

 i love the show i've performed …times. i am very lucky to be just as excited, anxious, self-conscious, nervous, on my closing day, March 16th 2013, as i was on my first, March 18th 2012. i'm lucky to know myself enough to trust that i can and will make a living doing what i love. it does take a certain type of performer to successfully maintain a theme park job, and i've always enjoyed it. i'm ready to move forward with my career, after 8 years of happily entertaining guests of disneyland, universal studios hollywood & japan. JAPAN. 

i know Japan. i know it very well, and i love it for what it is. this kind country has kept me safe, and it's people have never been less than exceptionally polite and giving. the generosity of the Japanese, is incomparable. i strive to endure their gracious qualities. 

timing, although sometimes relentless, is such an easy thing, if you just pay attention. eventually, you'll know why everything happens, when it happens. it's simple...you want something, go get it. 

i did.